I have a major social problem.....?
Answer:
I'm gonna sound a little tough here, but only because I think it's what you need. I'm gonna start off with a quote from my all-time favorite teacher, a very wise/caring person and role model for me: "Everyone has a path to be on but where it leads us is ALWAYS for us to choose and even the choices can be reviewed with new info..."
This is your challenge, and you need to find a way to adapt to it and overcome it. It's easy to blame one's problems on something that's beyond your control, like a chemical imbalance in your brain. I'm not saying that's not a possibility, it could be, but I think the power of your thinking can easily overcome that if you organize your effort into thoughts that can change your mindset/outlook.
Weight gain I think is normal, I don't think everyone gets it, I didn't, but I wouldn't worry so much about that unless you think you're using food to feel better. But you didn't mention that, so I don't think that's a problem. But really, I can't say -- only you are in the position to understand yourself better than anyone else, so don't use my response or anyone else's here as validation for what you "should" do (there is no should in life, do what you want/need in a way that would only help).
It's easy to develop low confidence if you focus on what's wrong, rather than what's positive. Acknowledge and recognize your weaknesses, but in a positive way. With anything, there's ALWAYS the choice of seeing it as positive or negative. It's easier to be negative, because it doesn't require effort, and although it's easier to do in the short run, in the long run it'll hurt you. Whereas in the long run, if you maintain a positive outlook, you'll develop a better mentality.
Notice your thoughts, they lead to your feelings, which warn you if something's wrong with your thoughts. Become aware of what your reactions to EVERYTHING are, and if they are negative and/or result in a bad feeling, gently change it to positive. That, I think, will help your confidence. I think you need to be more positive. Be positive and you will get positive. Read "The Secret", and really believe that.
If you keep telling yourself you can't do something, you won't. Notice how much you're saying you can't talk to women or whatever it may be. Negative thoughts = negative results. Positive thoughts = positive results. It's actually all about how you decide to look at things.
Well, I'll leave you from here, I think you know what you need. What you don't need is validation from anyone except yourself of what/who you are. I wish you all the best.
If you know you can get one and know its your fault and what you have to do, I don't understand what your question is, take a hint from Nike
just do it.
Well, if you had a sudden weight gain and change in mood you may have had issues with your Thyroid , which can create both those conditions, plus reduced libido etc. So get checked, get meds and get in gear.
There might be, but more probably it is just a matter of fear. I suffer from social anxiety disorder, and all it really makes me do is have little panic attacks when dealing with people I don't know very well. Medication helps, but really it is just a matter of getting out there and getting over it.
No...nothing's wrong with you...just need some practice and self confidence. Get out there & find something you like to do where you will have the opportunity to interact or encounter women.not at a bar, but something you enjoy such as bowling leauge, volleyball, line dancing, church event, volunteer for your favorite charity, book club, etc. Or if you are lacking in out of the house enjoyable activities...push yourself to learn something new...rock climbing, swimming, etc. Get out there...hold your head up...smile & be friendly.
No. Whether you ever have a girlfriend or not is your business. You can live without a girlfriend. Why are you concerned about having a girlfriend? Why is this a social problem? Everyone thinks differently about relationships, but I think it is best to wait for that special someone instead of having multiple special someones. This way you will have a healthy relationship and be STD free. Unfortunately, my parents sheltered me as a teenager and I have had to learn about the world in my 20s. Being sheltered is not good, but you will continue to learn about yourself as you continue to live unsheltered. I am almost 25years old and I have never had a girlfriend before. Eventually, I will have one.
You 'can't' do it because you've conditioned yourself not to. It's hard to go out of your comfort zone, but taking small steps is the only way. You do have to 'just do it,' but it seems less overwhelming when you take it slowly.
HUn there is nothin wrong with your brain, its a shame your so down on yourself, you seem so bright to me. (I am using my daughters account),
Your charisma is a lackin. Practice in the mirror, look at yourself and tell yourself " I can (insert what your goal is here)" and say it loud and proud. I am no therapist but i suggest talking to a neighbor, or getting together with a friend. Go out for dinner or something have a good time. I wish you the best in your many years to come. I hope i have helped you.
Go running
Do some aerobic exercizes
It will make you live longer
Make your heart stronger
Work out that stress!
You just need to start making contact with one person (as a friend) and eventually you'll have many friends. I know why you gained weight and that is because you confined yourself and find comfort in the refrigerator. Go out there and find one person. Church is a good place to start making friends. You don't even have to start talking to people, people will come to you. Try it.
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