How would you feel if someone told you " If I told everybody what I thought about them, you wouldn't like me"
Not sure how to feel about this. It's already put a damper on my day. Am I being overly sensitive or is there something being implied here ? Should I confront the issue or let it go ? Does they mean they don't like me or I wouldnt like them because what they would say about others would make them look like a jerk ?
Answer:
I would say let's go have a beer, I have something to tell you.
That probably the person wasn't someone I'd want to spend time with. Not a person that cares much about others feelings.
This person sounds very negative. I would tell that person that she/he is probably right...that I wouldn't like you so keep those thoughts to yourself! Don't let it bother you. If she/he has so many terrible things to say about/to others, what does that say about her/him?
Everyone (whether they admit it or not) thinks negatively about everyone in at least one aspect. Usually, the good qualities outweigh the bad qualities. It seems as if this person doesn't like something about you but it's not a big enough deal to say anything about. If you've never had problems with this person before, let it go. If you're uncomfortable around them, end the relationship and forget about it.
Everyone withholds things like that though. If I harped on my loved ones about every thing that may have bothered me in the past then everyone would be in a world of hurt. Just because you may not like some inane habit or thing regarding a friend or loved one doesn't mean that you dislike the person overall. It's inevitable that you're going to dislike some little thing about everyone. It's just not necessary to point all of these things out.
I would let it go, only a real passive agressive wimp would make such a statement. They generalize as to avoid being called on any potential point they would have to make. What do they mean? They mean they want to jack with your head that's all. If a real friend has a problem with you and you alone, they are going to spell it out to you and resolve it with you then and there. Anything else is garbage.
I think what this person is saying is that they often bite their tongue and don't tell all that they feel about someone. Being brutually honest does hurt people's feelings. That's because we often do NOT want to hear what is wrong with us. However, none of us are perfect, but by the same token we try to ignore those imperfections we have. Try not to allow this persons crude comments bring you down. Basically, they just showed you part of their imperfection, and you could even be as brutally honest and call them on it, but only if ya want to stoop to their level that is. Good Luck!
Well, being me I take everything personally, so I would assume they meant they had some stuff about me they didn't like and I wouldn't want to hear it. Generally, we already dislike those people tho...just one of those inner warning devices women have. So more than likely I would give the person the benefit of the doubt and ask them "do you mean I wouldn't like what you had to say?" and see how it goes from there. It's not that hard to dump an asswipe on yahoo. PS I like you a lot. so feckem.
I'd say this person has issues.
They may have issues of getting close to people. Sometimes those folks are offensive to get pushed away on purpose.
It's this person who has the problem. If they feel the need to feel negative about others, it's usually a comparison of self-issues.
You can ask why you would care. Or ask why they need to point out imperfections. Are they looking for a response in turn.
Are they asking you to point out their imperfections or expecting you to su*k up to them so you don't have to be negatively impacted by their offensiveness.
Who cares what they think?
Be secure in yourself.
that is a strange thing to say...
"If I told everyone what I thought about them"... (implies others) "you wouldn't like me" (why you?? - why should you care if this person told everyone what they thought of them or not?
My guess is that this person has bad feeling about alot of things maybe? and part of those things they "think about others" includes things about you possibly?
Not really sure. I would try to find out what exactly this person is meaning by this. cause it just doesn't really make sense.
Why do they care if you like them or not? are they a close friend of them - and then maybe they don't like someone you both know? - maybe they are afraid of making you made about a mutual friend or something.
I think I'd probably let it die in the water unless it ever came up again... or if it REALLY was eating at you after time passes by.
I think there is a context here that is not apparent from your wording. Did you seek an opinion? If so then this person has some issues with you that they are reluctant to reveal and therefore affect your relationship. If up to now you have had a good one it would probably be better to let it drop unless you feel strongly about what has not been said.
Well I don't know the situation leading up to this statement, but of anyone were to say that to me I wouldn't take it to heart. But I'd definitely confront the issue. If you don't confront it then it'll just linger over you... like a pesky mosquito.
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Answer:
I would say let's go have a beer, I have something to tell you.
That probably the person wasn't someone I'd want to spend time with. Not a person that cares much about others feelings.
This person sounds very negative. I would tell that person that she/he is probably right...that I wouldn't like you so keep those thoughts to yourself! Don't let it bother you. If she/he has so many terrible things to say about/to others, what does that say about her/him?
Everyone (whether they admit it or not) thinks negatively about everyone in at least one aspect. Usually, the good qualities outweigh the bad qualities. It seems as if this person doesn't like something about you but it's not a big enough deal to say anything about. If you've never had problems with this person before, let it go. If you're uncomfortable around them, end the relationship and forget about it.
Everyone withholds things like that though. If I harped on my loved ones about every thing that may have bothered me in the past then everyone would be in a world of hurt. Just because you may not like some inane habit or thing regarding a friend or loved one doesn't mean that you dislike the person overall. It's inevitable that you're going to dislike some little thing about everyone. It's just not necessary to point all of these things out.
I would let it go, only a real passive agressive wimp would make such a statement. They generalize as to avoid being called on any potential point they would have to make. What do they mean? They mean they want to jack with your head that's all. If a real friend has a problem with you and you alone, they are going to spell it out to you and resolve it with you then and there. Anything else is garbage.
I think what this person is saying is that they often bite their tongue and don't tell all that they feel about someone. Being brutually honest does hurt people's feelings. That's because we often do NOT want to hear what is wrong with us. However, none of us are perfect, but by the same token we try to ignore those imperfections we have. Try not to allow this persons crude comments bring you down. Basically, they just showed you part of their imperfection, and you could even be as brutally honest and call them on it, but only if ya want to stoop to their level that is. Good Luck!
Well, being me I take everything personally, so I would assume they meant they had some stuff about me they didn't like and I wouldn't want to hear it. Generally, we already dislike those people tho...just one of those inner warning devices women have. So more than likely I would give the person the benefit of the doubt and ask them "do you mean I wouldn't like what you had to say?" and see how it goes from there. It's not that hard to dump an asswipe on yahoo. PS I like you a lot. so feckem.
I'd say this person has issues.
They may have issues of getting close to people. Sometimes those folks are offensive to get pushed away on purpose.
It's this person who has the problem. If they feel the need to feel negative about others, it's usually a comparison of self-issues.
You can ask why you would care. Or ask why they need to point out imperfections. Are they looking for a response in turn.
Are they asking you to point out their imperfections or expecting you to su*k up to them so you don't have to be negatively impacted by their offensiveness.
Who cares what they think?
Be secure in yourself.
that is a strange thing to say...
"If I told everyone what I thought about them"... (implies others) "you wouldn't like me" (why you?? - why should you care if this person told everyone what they thought of them or not?
My guess is that this person has bad feeling about alot of things maybe? and part of those things they "think about others" includes things about you possibly?
Not really sure. I would try to find out what exactly this person is meaning by this. cause it just doesn't really make sense.
Why do they care if you like them or not? are they a close friend of them - and then maybe they don't like someone you both know? - maybe they are afraid of making you made about a mutual friend or something.
I think I'd probably let it die in the water unless it ever came up again... or if it REALLY was eating at you after time passes by.
I think there is a context here that is not apparent from your wording. Did you seek an opinion? If so then this person has some issues with you that they are reluctant to reveal and therefore affect your relationship. If up to now you have had a good one it would probably be better to let it drop unless you feel strongly about what has not been said.
Well I don't know the situation leading up to this statement, but of anyone were to say that to me I wouldn't take it to heart. But I'd definitely confront the issue. If you don't confront it then it'll just linger over you... like a pesky mosquito.
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