Anybody have experience being stalked?
Answer:
During my Sophmore year, I had this girl know my entire class schedule, what clothes I'd wear and what I liked for lunch. The thing is...I'm about a five on a 1-10 scale of good looks and my personality blows.
Then again, she wasn't much a prize, either.
no
Yea by a freaky girl in 9th grade and i got a restraining order abgainst her because she threatened me and my family because i wasnt paying attention to her!
Yes, but it was quite a long while back. In a different state than which I live now. I would share my experience , but I don't think it would fit your current problem, however each state has different laws about stalking. I will say this the people I was having to deal with were so professional at what they were doing I didn't know I was being stalked until it was too late, when it was time to come forward the police did believe me , but felt they could not protect me. Make the police and other law enforcement your best friends, these kind of people don't like the heat. Most important make sure the people you surround yourself with are really your friends and it's much harder for creeps to harm you. To be honest I have learned as much form criminals as the cops, sadly to say a criminal once told me if they were looking to hurt someone they could not do it if they always had their friends around.
About a year ago, I started dating this guy. He was nice enough, but not someone I could see myself having a relationship with. So, I told him I wasn't interested in him in that way.
It was ok at first. He would call, acting as if he just wanted to be my friend. The calls started becoming more frequent (like every few hours). Then the flowers started coming.
After a while, he was would call my cell phone and the my home phone over and over again. I counted 51 times in one day just on my cell. Emails and instant messeges and more flowers.
Then he started coming to my house at odd hours. He would show up when I wasn't there to leave things on my doorstep. Then he started showing up at 3am.
He was becoming angry on his phone calls and messeges. I called the local police to fill them in on what was going on and maybe get some advice on what to do. They told me they would watch for his car in my neighborhood. They were very nice and very helpful.
One night they actually caught him at my house at 1:45am.
Another thing...he proposed marriage to me on instant messenger. I He was totally serious. He had our life planned out in detail.
BTW...I only knew this guy for 3 weeks.
It was scary. Try to cut contact. If you aren't feeling safe in your home, give your local police a call just to let them know what is going on. I hope I helped a little.
Yea, I was too nice to her when I first met her. after that she didn't leave me alone. she even had her mother ask me to go out with her. she finally tried to run me over with her car while i was out cycling with a friend. after that i never saw her again.
I would let the police know the actions of the person. I know it's a big step, but if anything happens, you will have already contacted them so they can't say why didn't you go to the police. after all, that's what they are there for. if you let the subtle behavior keep happening, bigger bad behavior is around the corner ( maybe literally around the corner).
I had a friend who was stalked. he knew her schedule. when she got off the bus, he would be waiting somewhere close. he wouldn't approach her, just waiting. finally, she had the police confront him. he stopped immediately.
GL and stay alert
If you are disturbed by the behavior, no matter how minor it seems or how much other people discount it, take action NOW. It is much easier to nip the behavior in the bud, than it is to do something about it when it is full-scale stalking. Pay attention to your instincts - they are telling you something for a reason!!
When I was in high school, I dated the same guy for two years - he was the captain of the football team, I was the cheerleader - it was classic. He was talking marriage, etc., but I wanted to go on to college, date other guys, etc., so we broke up. He joined the Marines, and I lost track of him for about six months. Then, I started to get "heavy breathing" phone calls in the middle of the night, starting at about 10:00 pm, at least 5 nights a week. I couldn't prove it was him, but I kind of wondered.then, all of a sudden, he showed up at my college and started hanging out where I hung out, even though I was hanging out with other people, etc. I would just see him every where I went. He started coming in to my work (I worked in a store) and he would just hang around. I told my manager I didn't want to talk to him, and she told him if he wasn't going to buy something, he needed to leave. So he would just buy like a candy bar or something. All this time he was still calling me during the day, too - I would just try to get off the phone with him but he kind of made me nervous so I didn't want to be too harsh with him, because he was always saying things like, "You know I love you. I love you more than anyone ever has. No one will ever love you the way I love you. You know we are good together - why do you want to keep running away from it?" I was too nice for my own good!
One day, I was talking on the phone to the guy I was dating (who is now my hubby of 18 years!) and Creepy Guy beeped in on the other line. I told him I was busy and couldn't talk, and went back to my first call. Well, I turned around about 3 minutes later, and Creepy Guy was standing in my kitchen! I was the only one home and I was really scared - I told my future hubby that Creepy Guy was there and I needed to go, because I wanted to go outside where, at least, if anything happened, there would be witnesses!! Creepy Guy kept on with his "I love you more than anyone else ever will" stuff, and then he got all angry and told me I was a liar and *** and why did I tell him I loved him if I was going to be this way, etc. I tried to explain that when I told him I loved him, I meant it, but that people change and grow, etc. Well, he got really mad - by this time we are out in my front yard, and he is screaming at me, throwing his sunglasses at me, calling me every name in the book interspersed with "...But, I love you!" He had me cornered against the front door, and just then, my future hubby pulled up. Creepy Guy threw a punch that just missed me, and I ducked under his arm and ran and jumped in future hubby's truck. I just left the door wide open and everything! We started to pull out of my driveway, and Creepy Guy chased after me and started punching the window of the truck, smearing blood from his knuckles all over the glass, etc. We sped off, but he jumped in his car and started chasing us. We finally "escaped" by driving on a local AF base, where Creepy Guy couldn't follow.
After that, he dropped out of the college we were going to, and didn't call me during the day anymore, but kept calling with the heavy breathing stuff at night. I changed everything - where I went, the times I went there, etc. And I never went anywhere alone.
I thought it was over, but a couple of months later, he got a job cleaning the building where my second job was! I told my boss the whole ugly story, and she went to the head of the cleaning crew and told him what the deal was, and they moved him to a different building and I went to a different building, too. I had to tell all my co-workers not to tell any callers where I was at, etc. It was all very embarrassing, but absolutely necessary, I felt.
It finally all stopped when I married my husband - I guess he finally got the message then that it was hopeless and I wasn't going to change my mind.
The moral of my story is that creepy behavior escalates and can become dangerous behavior, and if I had been more stern with him up front, telling him to leave me alone instead of trying to let him down gently and still be friends with him, etc., maybe he wouldn't have kept at it for so long. So - listen to your instincts, and take steps to stop this behavior now, before it turns into something scarier.
Hope this helps - good luck!
The answers post by the user, for information only, FunQA.com does not guarantee the right.
More Questions and Answers: