How do i deal with my 6 y.o. son's bad deeds?

My son is a new student in a big school. everything about this school is new to him. the facilities, the teachers, classmates, systems. After 3 weeks, his teacher requested that i meet with her and the school's guidance counselor. i learned from this meeting all about my son's odd behavior in school.he can't stay in his place. gets frustrated easily when he knew he's wrong with his answers (pounded his head on the table, threw his things on the floor) to the exercises.he already hurt 3 of his classmates!we witnessed his going around the classroom, on the 2nd time we met with the school's guidance counselor.he even lied to the teachers about us, he told them i am his nanny and that his dad is the driver!i am so frustrated, depressed that i can't work properly.i asked him why he hurt his classmates, he said because he just hated them. one of them, threw pencils at him, the 2nd one, did not allow him to win in a game.my son is intelligent but i don't like his bad deeds.please help!

Answer:
That sounds like very worrying behaviour, and should be nipped in the bud before it becomes a lot more serious...the last thing you would want is for your son to cause serious damage to school property, or worse, a fellow classmate as you will be liable for very serious consiquences.

There's only so much counciling/guidence you can suggest via phycologists, etc. However you really need to put YOUR foot down and take responsibility. Seek professional help if you are not sure how to react to his behavioural problems.

I would nto suggest milly-coddling him, as this is too serious. You need to introduce some firm boundaries for his behaviour with strict punishments that you enforce when he is bad.

When he is good, make sure you reinforce that with rewards. But DO NOT reward behaviour that should be considered normal, i.e. being nice. Only reward him when he makes an effort to be extra nice i.e. helping mummy with chores, etc

Sounds like the spawn of satan. Sorry, bad joke.

Seriously though, I think you need a professional diagnosis. He could have severe ADD, and/or Dyslexia.

For now I would pull him out of school and home school him until you have reasonable assurance that he is able to act respectfully in a public school.

I don't really have an answer for you, I am only a devoted student of Psychology, on my way to a Doctorate. There is not enough time for me, to go off into the tangents and bring up the subjects and talk on the different levels that would need to be addressed. But I will gently say what you most likely already feel deep inside. You son needs professional doctors, both those of psychology in general or that of a Psychiatrist, who can prescribe pharmaceuticals if needed.

There are multi tiered layers that would have to be peeled back studied and observed in aggressive behaviors. It could be an imbalance of chemicals natural to the brain, but absent or not adequate for you son, it could be emotionally derived, caused by the trauma of divorce, abuse, (abuse is not just physical nor am I trying to impugne you or imply you are not a good mother, but abuses are seen a reality from others not just 1st circle family members...they can be from family but extended...or neighbhors etc, etc.)

I would do a web-search and see what I could find out on the habits and the attitudes of the boy. I would check to see what kind of therapy or doctors that are available in the area, I would see how to afford such doctors, maybe you might find a participation in a study of such behavior.

If you are Christian as I am, I wish to be a Doctor of Christian Psychology.I would also take this matter before the Master of Doctors...The Living God of Israel...with prayer and many days of fasting to seek answers for, and deliverances from such traumas.

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How do i deal with my 6 y.o. son's bad deeds?

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