How to get rid of my shyness?
Answer:
You need to get a good education in assertive communication. It will help your self confidence. I will also help you resolve issues with others. I was like you at one time but assertive communication and getting out there worked for me. Know that your opinion always counts no matter what others think. You may want to work with a psychologist on this for extra support. It works. I used to be so shy that I would throw up if I had to stand in front of the class for anything- and these were my friends! Now I could tap dance on stage if only someone would ask. A politician friend of mine confided that he has stage fright. I offered to take his time slot aand my own on stage that night. Also find a book by a Dr. Maltz called Pshcho Cybernetics. If no in the stores, a library can get it in for you.
You are a valuable person, you just haven't discovered that yet. Hang in there!
Volunteer work. It may sound crazy, but it helps alot.
this is somewhat of a cultural issue and not something that is completely your fault...people in western societies typically look down on those who are shy or very introverted, whereas, in china for instance, its known that children who are shy and more reserved are actually accepted more by their peers...unfortunately youve developed depression because of your shyness, i would recommend that you talk to your doctor and get him or her to refer to a psychologist and perhaps try going on a medication...these things dont always work and of course theres always a stigma attached to having a mental illness like depression but i can tell you from experience that its worth trying...but you have the right be comfortable in your own skin even if you are a shy person...the best thing to do is seek out relationships with people who will appreciate your quiet personality and disregard those who treat you badly...being shy is not typically an illness but a personality type...but it sounds like you have a social phobia...i was also diagnosed with this a long time ago and i still struggle with it...you can send me an email if you want to talk more about it...
Hey don't worry. There's always an answer/solution to everything.I understand where you're coming from. I used to be shy when I was a kid and it does lead to low self confidence because you don't let anyone into your space and try to avoid them if possible. When you do this people start to somewhat get offended or believe that you're rejecting them as a possible friend etc. But of course this is not what you intend from being shy. You're just used to being this way and it's been with you so long , it's getting harder to change. But don't worry because you can change it. The biggest part of changing this is challenging yourself. When a social situation arises, take advantage of it! When you're about to turn down some invitation because you don't want to face a crowd of people, tell yourself no..this will only make it worse. Make it a goal, everytime you put yourself out there you're one step closer to meeting your goal and feeling that much better. Trust me it's worth it. Every little step you take is so worth it because it will boost your confidence. I never really had huge issues with being shy, but I was shy during my childhood and a little in highschool. I think the second biggest step is finding friends you can be yourself around. I'm not talking about the ones that you have to conform to or act differently infront of. The closer you get to being yourself infront of them the better. This makes it easier because your friends aren't going to make fun of you for being you, they'll appreciate you for who you are and show you how great it is as well. When you have a good group of friends this brings you up the ladder by 5 steps. Avoid being friends with people in your situation. I'm pretty sure they're just as great as you are, but if you all team up together it'll be harder to get over your problem of being shy because you will be able to complain and vent about situations...and this will allow you to give excuses instead of trying to burst out of the bubble. If you have friends like that, it's ok but try to surround yourself with positive and outgoing people. And when you've recovered from your shyness you can help your friends out that have this problem, if they're are any. Just take it step by step and day by day. It's never too late. Remember when you're about to avoid some crowd or not say anything, force yourself. It's easier said then done, but it can certainly be done. You have the power to do and say whatever you like. If someone gives their opinion about you that's their problem. And most people that do give mean opinions about others to their face,are most likely suffering from lower self confidence because they need to put people down to get up. If you want, it might be easier to do this if you have comebacks ready. Because I know when you think about putting yourself out there , in your situation you'd rather be ready then not. For now get some comebacks ready, even though you might not even need them so you feel more comfortable. Eventually you won't even think twice before speaking or going somewhere in public. Be yourself, be creative, have fun, say what you want ..when you wana say it. There's no one stopping you. You can choose to be happy. So make the choice now, and get out there. You're a great person, and you know it. Just by being yourself, you can show everyone else just that. Don't try too hard and don't not do anything about it. Just be you, it's so easy.practice with your very close friends and make new ones. If you wana make new friends and aren't sure how, just start conversation whenever possible if it's in class or at work or what not. You'd be suprised how far you can get. The more friends you have the more confident you'll feel, the more support you'll have and the less sad you'll feel. Go out with them too and enjoy life. Don't mind my LONG message. I just like to make sure I put everything I could in there. ...Don't second guess yourself. Just do it :)
Do the things you fear, and the death of fear is certain. You might feel nervous and self-conscious attempting to interact with the new people.Take daring steps: Enroll yourself with a dance class. Take classes on public speaking, music and singing, it will polish off your personality and bring forward your sleeping talents, if your feel overexcited or nervous once a while, take 1 tab of ciplar (cipla) and alprex 0.25mg after consulting your physecian, it will keep you calm and confident till you break the cycle of your nervousness
I can be shy around people I get bad "vibes" from, and what has helped me is surrounding myself with people I get good "vibes" from. If you don't believe in that stuff or don't get "vibes" from people when you meet them, then I guess just try to surround yourself with people who like the same things as you. Take your favorite intrest and find events around your town that have something to do with it. For example, if you like books, join a book club. If you can find a group/community/club/whatever with people who have similar interests, they probably won't intimidate you and your can overcome your shyness.
Another solution that has helped me a LOT: learning. I took a bunch of advanced classes on the area I do best in, and I learned a whole lot. But the biggest thing, is that I got to learn so much about myself and become more confident with myself and my opinions. I can now comfortably express what I think about something, because I don't care anymore what people think or if it is wrong, because now I know I am not dumb.
So pretty much, getting involved with people/activities that suit your interests, and taking challenging courses.
Hope this helps, good luck!
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