I'm a huge introvert and not very social...but I want to be able to feel close to someone, what do I do?
Answer:
you know i feel completely the same
but it is a conference thing
i was always afraid i would say or do the wrong thing
to either give me away when i was a guy
or made me look to male while a girl
for other words not right or not fitting into the so called gender role
i learned friends that are that shallow and care about that sort of thing are friends that are not worth having
it really is important to be your self
and people will like you and respect you more for doing that
i can not tell you where to look for a friend how to find one and keep one as i am still working on that
but i know real friends come out from places you never thought to look for them
good luck and all the best
You'll have to let yourself trust and open up to someone you want to be close to. ~
Figure out what you like to do or what interests you. Do you like animals? Volunteer at a clinic or find a rescue network in your area. Like art? Museums have social network clubs. There are people like you out there...i'm one of them. I would still be single if I hadn't met my husband at work! Good luck.
Don't take this the wrong way. I think your introversion has to stem from your feelings of yourself. If you don't like being in groups it is probably because you have a fear of how you're being judged by others. You need to get involved in something to boost your self-image. yeah, that sounds like something you don't want to hear, and it's corny...but, if you really reflect on yourself, i'm pretty sure you'll realize that your introversion stems from your feelings of yourself...and if you want to find someone to be with, you really need to address these issues, or even when you find someone, you still won't be happy. talking to a therapist wouldn't be a bad idea...there's nothing wrong with using a professional to assist you in discovering things about yourself that you can't do on your own..good luck
Step out... coming from one Melancholy to another.. you have to step out. The best advise I have ever received was that I need to take my eyes off of my self and turn them on other people.. When you start to notice other people, then they will start to notice you. It isn't easy when you are quiet. Ultimately... think about this seriously... self-esteem is born in selfishness. It isn't a put down.. it is that when we focus on our selves we die. Look at other people, take care of your self, decide what it is you need to see and hear.. including that which comes from your own voice... ESPECIALLY what comes from your own voice. If I come up to you and call you a loser... well you are going to get defensive and tell me I am a jerk. If you come up to yourself and tell yourself that you are a loser.YOU ARE GOING TO LISTEN TO IT! Feed positive things into your mind. You are priceless... understand that about you. Blessings.
From a non-professional. Just an idea:
First, list and connect to the parts of yourself you like the best:
such as what you have done that you are most proud of,
which characteristics you find most convenient & helpful,
and the hopes and dreams you want to focus on.
Be sure that you are your own best friend first of all, and know what you want to present to others.
Most of the people I have known found their match either where they work or go to school, or doing what they love to do best. So look for a mate in school or work, or find a group hobby that you truly enjoy. (Forget bars and churches.)
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