How to train my mind to fear nobody?
I am sick and tired of fearing people, I wanna be unstoppable, yet likable. I want to get along with people, but also be respected and treated well.
Answer:
You don't want to train your mind to "fear nobody." There are some people that you need to be afraid of; the person who fears nobody has lost an important safety valve.
To be respected, one has to earn respect; and the best way to do this is to first respect yourself, and second to treat other people with respect. You cannot demand respect, or even liking; this is something that other people have to want to give to you.
And at that, this is something that you don't necessarily want from other people. For example, do you really want someone who is, say, a pedophile or a rapist to like you? How about a thief? Someone who harms other people? Do you really care if someone like this dislikes you? If you're disliked by people who are themselves dislikable and not worthy of respect, isn't their dislike of you almost a validation that you're not a bad person?
Stop viewing others as potential antagonists. Consider them as fellow travelers. Most people want to treat others well, and will if you can convince them that you appreciate them. If you can learn to empathize with others, they will usually warm up to you and not give you any grief. Start by recognizing that others are just as vulnerable as you and are in the same boat. Work on this for a while.
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Answer:
You don't want to train your mind to "fear nobody." There are some people that you need to be afraid of; the person who fears nobody has lost an important safety valve.
To be respected, one has to earn respect; and the best way to do this is to first respect yourself, and second to treat other people with respect. You cannot demand respect, or even liking; this is something that other people have to want to give to you.
And at that, this is something that you don't necessarily want from other people. For example, do you really want someone who is, say, a pedophile or a rapist to like you? How about a thief? Someone who harms other people? Do you really care if someone like this dislikes you? If you're disliked by people who are themselves dislikable and not worthy of respect, isn't their dislike of you almost a validation that you're not a bad person?
Stop viewing others as potential antagonists. Consider them as fellow travelers. Most people want to treat others well, and will if you can convince them that you appreciate them. If you can learn to empathize with others, they will usually warm up to you and not give you any grief. Start by recognizing that others are just as vulnerable as you and are in the same boat. Work on this for a while.
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