I told my mom i'm not a virgin anymore and she's very upset...hasn't spoken to me for 3 days...?

hi...i'm 17 yr old girl. last week my mom and one of her friends were talking about teenagers and promiscuity and everything concerned. i overheard her saying that she trusts me and knows i'd never make the wrong choices. i was so struck by this...i'm not a virgin and she takes me to be an angel. i was sad and felt like i was deceiving her. i haven't been dishonest with her ever and told her that i'm not a virgin and have done some crazy things. as expected she was angry and yelled at me. i know she was very sad n i was miserable that i made her sad. i expected her to talk to me the next day and was geared to make it up to her. but she didn't even utter a word to me the next day and it's been 3 days with no change. i'd do anything to make her talk to me again. what do i do? plz temme. it's killing me. how do i approach her? she's been ignoring me since and i don't know what to do. my dad is away on an official tour and i am the only daughter. plz plz plz tell me wat to do...

Answer:
she is just probably shocked at your confession but i think 3 days is long enough to have digested this info.Are you very close to your mum?do you share what you're upto with her?if no then it might be abit difficult to broach this subject with her bt i suggest you do break the silence ask her why she has been quiet and how she feels about what you told her.DO let me know how she reacts!!All the best!

i'd be upset too. you are too young to make those decisions, especially since i doubt that it started when you were 17. your mom doesn't want you to be a single mom with 4 kids. she wants you to be safe. let her get over her disappointment.

Tell youre mother youre sorry and she must remember youre not that littel girl enymore and she needs to trust you
(tell her you love her and youl always be her littel girl )

Try to apologise to her but if she doesn't respond just write her a letter and tell her how you feel. Leave it on her bed when she goes out and at least that way she will know how you feel. She will come round, just wait it out a bit.

There is a huge difference between losing your virginity in a responsible and timely manner and being promiscuous, crazy etc etc
Your mum has to face the facts. She bought you up well to know the do's and don'ts. You followed this and you seem old enough to have made a correct choice. I would be more concerned with why she is still living her life through mine. What is she trying to cling to or be in denial about. Soon you may be married and moving out, it is just a fact that you aren't a little girl anymore.
You are fine princess, I reckon your mum needs to write and ask...

Your mom is taking time to deal with it all. Be patient. She has the right to be angry. She is dealing with that anger her own way to prevent taking it out on you. Just give her space and be on your best behavior, as long as it's sincere...don't want to have it mistaken for "sucking up"...

I'm sorry, but it's very wrong for your mother to be treating you like this. I mean...c'mon..what did she expect, REALISTICALLY speaking?! I went throught some of the same crap when I was your age. Honestly, if I were you, and what I actually did in the past, is treat her the same way she is treating you. Once she comes around and tries to talk to you, throw it back in her face, saying I THOUGHT I could go to you and talk to you about anything, but APPARENTLY NOT, then I'd tell her to stay out of my life.

That may be too harsh for you, but honestly, it's not fair for your mother to be judging you like she is. You can't have an open relationship with her if she's going to treat you like this everytime you go to her and tell her personal things that she may not agree with, and have her turn away and treat you like this. She needs to be talking to you. Also, my advice, if you are sexually active is to get on birth control pills RIGHT AWAY, (you can get them WITHOUT an exam and for FREE at planned parenthood, if you don't want to go to your family doc) and **ALWAYS** use a condom. BE SAFE about it. Best Wishes.

Well now I know I'm not telling my mum until I'm 30.

Were you and your mother very close before this happened?
The wisest thing would have been not to tell her, but now it's done and you must try to win back her trust It may take quite a long time, but it can happen.
Be patient and understanding. Bring her flowers, tell her you wish to talk and wait until she's ready.
Whatever happens, don't let guilt take over. Even if she doesn't approve, she has to respect you and learn to accept you. I tell you this because I have lived both the experience of being a daughter and a mother.

the same thing happened to me when my mom found out i wasnt a virgin. I really like the idea of writing a letter to let her know how you feel

Perhaps it was a bit reckless to tell her. Had you a choice?

I think you did the right thing in telling her. I'm surprised at all the comments saying that you should have kept your mouth shut. Either way, what's done is done.
If I were you, try and show her that you are responsible enough to make those types of decisions, try talking to her, break the silence. If she refuses to talk to you, then by all means Write a letter. Pour your heart out. Tell her exactly how you feel. Act as an adult, don't use harsh words, tell her you feel bad for hurting her, but show her you are responsible. It will help I promise. Good Luck.

The answers post by the user, for information only, FunQA.com does not guarantee the right.

FunQA.com

I told my mom i'm not a virgin anymore and she's very upset...hasn't spoken to me for 3 days...?

Topic