Why do I get flustered and feel awkward when I'm introduced to someone?
What should I do in these situations? I don't have a problem meeting people but then there is a silence and I feel uncomfortable and get flustered for words. Aghhh!!
Answer:
Lexi, it's hard when you meet new people, especially on a new job. We want to make a good impression, but we don't yet know much about the company, the people there, etc. I suspect you are still young and don't have a lot of business experience, which makes it harder. After some years in the business world, you will have a pretty good idea what kind of small talk is done. You will also be an experienced businesswoman and will feel comfortable in these situations. It may not feel like it now, but it's true.
Are you insecure in other situations or just in this new job? If you feel like this when you meet people in all situations, you may just be very shy or you may have a problem with insecurity. If it is insecurity, you need to find out why you are that way, so you might want to go to therapy, even for a short time, to find out what is underneath that insecurity and how to get past it
If you are naturally shy and always have been, then you need to figure out a technique that will work for you. You obviously have no problem when you first meet someone, but after the introductions are over and the few basics are covered, you are lost. For some situations, you can prepare ahead of time some things you might talk about. For example, on the job, when you meet someone and get past the basics, you could ask the person how long they have worked with the company, what do they do, and other questions you might think are appropriate for your job.
If you are going to a club, party, or any social situation, you can also prepare ahead of time what kinds of things you might say. You can ask someone where they work, and depending on where you live, you can ask them if they have always lived there, you can ask them where they went to college, what they majored in, you get the idea. Then, in social situations, you could then bring the person to meet your friends, so you are not the only one talking. Or if you want to end the conversation, you can say "it was nice meeting you, but my friends are waiting for me," then shake his hand and say your good-byes.
Shyness or insecurity? You need to think about it to know which it really is. Shyness, you will eventually either grow out of or learn more and more techniques as you get older. Insecurity is a bigger problem - some of the same techniques will work out, but you won't grow out of it - it won't change - until you change it. Think about it and good luck
Sounds like you are nervous. First, be ok with a short silence. Smile. And then ask a couple of questions such as 'how long have you been with the company', 'what is your role and what do you do in this role'. And then in the end, follow up with a friendly handshake and say 'see you around!'.
I think this has to do with the way you see yourself, i mean it has to do with your self esteem. Try to build up confidence in yourself, see yourself as a unique person. You must consciously create a free mind for yourself when evr you are meeting with new people.
Did you know that most famous actors are shy? I've been very shy all my life but I learned, in time, how to "handle it". I loved acting but didn't think I could do it but I tried. I was in Drama/Theatre Arts and I found that I could totally turn into the person I played without much effort. The lesson here is that if you find yourself in one of your difficult moments of silence, you can learn to fake it and in time, you either get over your discomfort with this method or get over your shyness. I know, however, that shyness comes from low self worth/esteem so try reading some books on the subject and have your close friends/family call you on the behaviors you're trying to change so that you're aware of when & how they happen. They'll love helping you out...
It's natural!
It happens to some people especially when they are introduced to something new and unknown. In a few days things will get better . You must be a bit shy! after all it's a new job! Give yourself the opportunity to get to know your colleagues ,keep telling yourself ,tomorrow will be a better day ! And it will be!
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