Avoid hurt is a good way to grow up?
And depressions don't come from denials on pain and hurt?
Answer:
Well, I don't think that we should continually re-live the hurts and the failures of the past, just as we shouldn't fear the negativity that may be lurking in the future. That kind of thinking can envelop our psyche to the point that we can become completely unproductive and miserable.
However, if we come face to face with a problem during the normal course of living, we need to address it immediately and with conviction. We need to accept that a problem is occurring and go about fixing it as best we can at the moment it occurs.
If we cannot resolve the problem or cannot determine a long term solution, we need to accept that fact and move on. Not all life experiences can be resolved perfectly. There are only imperfect solutions to imperfect problems.
So, don't avoid the hurt when it smacks you in the face. And, don't obsess about it after it is over. Accept it and move on.
It is impossible to avoid pain. It comes to all of us, sooner or later. You can deny it or self-medicate it (through alcohol or drugs) or, if you are a parent you can try and protect your child from it. But, ultimately, bad things happen to every one. So the best strategy is to learn to cope with it. You can't learn to cope with it if you never experience it. So, yes. To grow up and live as a complete human being requires experiencing the pain of life.
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