Why does she do this?

my girlfriend wont do anything more than a quick kiss unless 1 of my hands is touching her lower back. i dont mean her bottom. i know a lot of her other girlfriends have treated her badly in the past but she's a really nice person and i really really like her. a lot. ok i love her. but why does she feel like that and why does she make me do that?

i need suggestions on what shes thinking and how she feels. also what can i say to her im not very good at talking about this type of thing.

i know she loves me she calls me her girl, but im worried. what might be wrong?

suggestions or ideas please?

Answer:
1) You said her other girls. . Are you a lesbian?

2) Do you mean that you have to have a hand on her lower back for you to do anything more?

If that's the case, she might have security and trust issues. Different actions and touches mean different things. The hand on her back might mean, subconciously to her, a feeling of security and safety - that you won't leave her. It might sound silly to you, but she might not even realize it. You said that her girlfriends have treated her badly before - perhaps she didn't feel safe and secure around them?


I don't think it has anything to do with her not loving you. But this is something she personally *needs.* Think of it like a security blanket for someone who can't fall asleep without it.


I think a good approach would be to spend more time together, mentally, then physically. I'm not implying that you two can't keep your paws off each other, nor do I mean you have to take a vow of chastity. But do more talking then physical intimacy for awhile. Let her in on your very personal thoughts, but also focus time on HER thoughts and opinions.

It might be grueling, but it can be worth it.

Feel free to mail me and talk to me about it.
<3 Cleo
You may hate talking about these things, but there's really no way to know without asking her. She may have been abused, that may be her comfort spot. For all we know, it could be her most errogenous spot! Wish I could be more help, but you really do need to talk to her!

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