Sexual abuse by one of your parents or both. Is anyone dealing?
with the long term affects from this. I am 42 and I deal with
it daily still. Feeling like I was never loved and alone in life
is hard to take sometimes. I live without knowing what a normal family is. I feel like I have been robbed of so many
things that I should of had, like a normal family life.
I don't talk to my sisters because they to were abused and
no one communicates in anyway. We have all gone our
separate ways except the parents they stayed together.
I will never understand, and I just wonder how people like
myself cope from time to time when you remember the abuse
and how you deal with it. I have talked to doctors but the
memories are to painful to relive. I am just wondering if there
is anyone out there like me. I'm getting married soon, and
I feel like I've been robbed of that family that should be supporting me, no father to walk me down the isle and I
would never want them back in my life, but I am just curious
how others deal with these issues
Answer:
You are not alone
What you are feeling, although painful, is normal
It was not your fault
The only way through this is with a therapist but most importantly the right therapist for you.
One of the better sites on the web that deal with this issue is www.rainn.org
They can answer all your questions and help you find the help you need.
Dealing with abuse is like dealing with a splinter in that the longer you wait to deal with it the more it hurts. But even though the road to recovery is a long one, I can tell you personally that if you take the time to travel it, learn to love yourself, and make it to the end, then you can be the happiest person you know.
Six years ago if anyone tried to tell me I could ever be happy, I would have thought they were crazy but now I am, and if I can do it anyone can.
You can make it.
I was sexually abused but I chose to forgive
In life you have to make choices
and you can choose to start off on a new page
and brake the cycle of abuse buy giving your husband and your family the best possible chance not to go trough what you went trough.
Or you can spend the next years of your life and still give your parents the power over your life that makes you unhappy.
Move on... and give yourself the love you never received
there are 12 step programs that deal with sexual abuse, and its effect on the adult, so much later in like.
Talking to someone who has been tere, knows what it feels like, and knows how to get through it is the best i can reccommend.
Your parents have a sickness to commit such acts on you. I know of several people who have been abused in some way. Many people cope with these situations differently; however, I believe the best way to cope is through forgiveness. You may never forget, but you do have the power to forgive. Forgiveness comes from Colossians 3:13, 'Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.' By forgiving, you will also be freeing yourself. At this point, you are carrying so much burden and anger, which can take a toll on your life. Forgiveness and a relationship with Jesus will give you peace.
Please know that the Lord loves you very much. He hurts when you hurt. God wants you to come to Him, leaving your hurt, pain, and anger at the feet of Jesus. He wants you to forgive your family, rid your burden, and move on to a healthier life. Although, you will soon become a Mrs., please do not think that your husband will fill the void for the family that you never had. He does not have the power or capibility to fulfull this--only God can. We are all human and humans make mistakes. Your husband, even though he loves you deeply, will disppoint you at times. The Bible says in Psalm 62:5-8, 'My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from Him. He only is my rock and my salvation: He is my defence; I shall not be moved. In God is my salvation and my glory; the rock of my strength, and my refuge, is in God. Trust in Him at all times; ye people, pour out your heart before him: God is a refuge for us.' If you put your trust in the Lord, and Him completely, you will not be disappointed.
Our earthly family is very temporary; however, our heavenly family is permanent and forever. Consider developing a relationship with Jesus and join a Bible believing church and connect with other Christians. I believe this will help you form a foundation of loving friends, who are your Christian family. God Bless.
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it daily still. Feeling like I was never loved and alone in life
is hard to take sometimes. I live without knowing what a normal family is. I feel like I have been robbed of so many
things that I should of had, like a normal family life.
I don't talk to my sisters because they to were abused and
no one communicates in anyway. We have all gone our
separate ways except the parents they stayed together.
I will never understand, and I just wonder how people like
myself cope from time to time when you remember the abuse
and how you deal with it. I have talked to doctors but the
memories are to painful to relive. I am just wondering if there
is anyone out there like me. I'm getting married soon, and
I feel like I've been robbed of that family that should be supporting me, no father to walk me down the isle and I
would never want them back in my life, but I am just curious
how others deal with these issues
Answer:
You are not alone
What you are feeling, although painful, is normal
It was not your fault
The only way through this is with a therapist but most importantly the right therapist for you.
One of the better sites on the web that deal with this issue is www.rainn.org
They can answer all your questions and help you find the help you need.
Dealing with abuse is like dealing with a splinter in that the longer you wait to deal with it the more it hurts. But even though the road to recovery is a long one, I can tell you personally that if you take the time to travel it, learn to love yourself, and make it to the end, then you can be the happiest person you know.
Six years ago if anyone tried to tell me I could ever be happy, I would have thought they were crazy but now I am, and if I can do it anyone can.
You can make it.
I was sexually abused but I chose to forgive
In life you have to make choices
and you can choose to start off on a new page
and brake the cycle of abuse buy giving your husband and your family the best possible chance not to go trough what you went trough.
Or you can spend the next years of your life and still give your parents the power over your life that makes you unhappy.
Move on... and give yourself the love you never received
there are 12 step programs that deal with sexual abuse, and its effect on the adult, so much later in like.
Talking to someone who has been tere, knows what it feels like, and knows how to get through it is the best i can reccommend.
Your parents have a sickness to commit such acts on you. I know of several people who have been abused in some way. Many people cope with these situations differently; however, I believe the best way to cope is through forgiveness. You may never forget, but you do have the power to forgive. Forgiveness comes from Colossians 3:13, 'Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.' By forgiving, you will also be freeing yourself. At this point, you are carrying so much burden and anger, which can take a toll on your life. Forgiveness and a relationship with Jesus will give you peace.
Please know that the Lord loves you very much. He hurts when you hurt. God wants you to come to Him, leaving your hurt, pain, and anger at the feet of Jesus. He wants you to forgive your family, rid your burden, and move on to a healthier life. Although, you will soon become a Mrs., please do not think that your husband will fill the void for the family that you never had. He does not have the power or capibility to fulfull this--only God can. We are all human and humans make mistakes. Your husband, even though he loves you deeply, will disppoint you at times. The Bible says in Psalm 62:5-8, 'My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from Him. He only is my rock and my salvation: He is my defence; I shall not be moved. In God is my salvation and my glory; the rock of my strength, and my refuge, is in God. Trust in Him at all times; ye people, pour out your heart before him: God is a refuge for us.' If you put your trust in the Lord, and Him completely, you will not be disappointed.
Our earthly family is very temporary; however, our heavenly family is permanent and forever. Consider developing a relationship with Jesus and join a Bible believing church and connect with other Christians. I believe this will help you form a foundation of loving friends, who are your Christian family. God Bless.
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