How do you forgive yourself when other won't? How do you get rid of guilt when you're truly remorseful?



Answer:
There is a vital difference between guilt (a judgment against oneself) and a discerning conscience. With a conscience, I accept that this or that past act of mine was unskilful and had, or will have, harmful consequences for myself and/or others, but I do not blame myself. I simply do the best I can to learn from that experience and make the inner and outer commitments not to repeat my mischoices.

How far can you accept and believe that you are a good person who did (or said) something unskilful, and that you are human and not perfect but are now wiser?

As for others' non-forgiveness, I am remembering that the wise old Elizabeth Kubler Ross said "what other people think of me is their problem". You have no say in, or responsibility for, the other person's judgment against you. If this is a person in your life, you may experience that you dropping your judgment against you may pave the way for them to drop their judgment against you, but I wonder if you believe you have a basis for expecting or demanding that of them (as distinct from wishing for it)?
no one is perfect. Face your weakness and do something good for people.
ok, so you are remorseful. next.

what good is it that you will carry around the weight of guilt? what good does it do anyone or anything? what harm?

how long must you flay yourself with the whips of your remorse? how much must you bleed?

you know after awhile, the refusal of another to forgive is nothing less than punishment. what was the crime? how dire the punishment?
Not knowing more about what your feeling quilty about or what the others are doing is it possible your quilt makes you think the others aren't forgiving you?
move on.show that person how sorry you are.if your guilty then admit it,accept it and maybe learn a valuabe lesson.Everyone makes mistakes. hey! no one's perfect.Be sorry and promise yourself that it won't happen again to another person.we dont know that someday when you meet again, he/she had already forgiven you! Just cheer up, relax, and move on, you dont want to be stuck in that situation forever!!
Every time I do something wrong to someone, I try to resolve the situation or problem by making up with the person. Doing something so nice, that what was done wrong, get the look or the feeling of nothing when compare what the good thing you did, and of course apologize to the person. I honor very much someone that can look at the others face and admit being wrong, they are mostly smart people whom don't want to go wrong again.
I think you are on the right path, because you can at least admit had done something wrong, most people avoid to face their own mistakes and weakness. They go like, no one is perfect and bla bla bla.The second step, I guess is turn the wrong right or if that can't be done, ensure that it won't happen again.
Remember, forgiveness we don't ask, we gain.

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