How do you deal with arrogant people?
I played in a band with a really good guitarist - (he had a degree in music and no one else did). He would make comments like "If you want to play in front of audiences, we have work to do". People would ask where we were deficient in our playing, and for tips, but he wouldn't answer.
He would also come across as if he was better than everyone because he had a better job. The other guys in the band didn't feel they could even ttalk to the guy because he'd come out with something that would make everyone feel inferior during normal conversation.
Eventually, I had to fire him because the rest of the band said that if I didn't, they would all quit! So I let him go.
How could I have prevented this? We lost good talent, all because this arrogant guitarist didn't understand the impact he had on others.
Answer:
well if you are unable to contradict the arrogant person and assert your own perspective then tell them directly how they appear. It sounds like you were tolerating this person's behavior for a while and only acted when forced to by others, these things have to be nipped in the bud rather than allowed to fester, particularly in professional relationships there's no excuse for that kind of behavior.
Be also arrogant! Try to irritate that person. in this way he wont irritate you! Try to show him what he did by doing it so or him to realize it!
The most appropriate and efficient method in dealing with these sorts is by way of a steel pipe. The second they display their attitude problem, say nothing, simply apply pipe to mouth and general facial area as needed.
i can't answer your question meaningfully - but, is the band playing better now that he is gone? Or are they just happier without him?
It sounds like he had more relevant experience and education and that he could have helped the rest of the band get better. Or even that he was more realistic in what was needed ( practice) before you all went public.
i imagine that the best you could have done was to get everybody talking to each other, about what was wanted, and what the goals and methods were.
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