Is my reaction justified?
Answer:
Just think of developing listening power, tolerance and forebearance. If they talk about something, its because they need to talk about it or its just their standard of conversation. By you getting irritated, it means, that u r mingling with people who are not your kind. Try to look for better group of friends to be with! Just one friend, but who makes you feel more comfortable in a conversation, is better than to have 10 friends who are not your type!!
please do not try to reform the world... do not listen to others talking themselves...
have concern when somebody talks to you...
take care of yourself...
The job of every human being is to do their own work. To discover their own negative beliefs and patterns, and to heal them. If something like a Paris Hilton appears on the screen in front of us, and we find ourselves hating her and wanting to punish her, THAT is an oppotunity for us to heal ourselves. If we find ourselves becoming irritated at someone for no apparent reason, that is another opportunity to discover something about ourselves, own it, and let it go. When we do that kind of healing, we fit better in the world. We find it easier to be easy and happy and loving. We find it easy to be wise. Here is a story about a wise man:
It is 11:00 a.m. on a Sunday when a guy walks into a restaurant alone carrying a newspaper. A few minutes later, a couple walk in. A waitresses comes over and begins to seat the couple while ignoring the single guy. He starts to get pissed, then remembers that he is a human being, and we are all trying to live in a civilized world here. So he smiles and says loud enough for all to hear "excuse me ma'am. I know I look like a single guy who is going to buy a small breakfast and a cup of coffee and then sit at your table for a solid hour and leave you a dollar tip. These folks who came in behind me are clearly in a hurry, will order twice as much food and will leave you five dollars or so. So here is a crisp new $5 bill. Please seat us in the order that we all came in." Everyone smiles. The waitress gets treated fairly. He gets a nice breakfast and is welcome back to the restaurant. The couple get a chuckle. Now learning to go through life with the ability to react in such a way that everyone smiles is always justified. Anything else is just plain hurting yourself.
In my opinion,
Feelings don't need to be justified. Actions based on those feelings do. If you listen to people talking and they are discussing something obvious but you don't point that out, you are making a decision to not get involved and not cause an unnecessary issue. You may feel that they are rediculus but making the decision not to cause an issue would be a responsible choice. If the people are discussing something but have the information incorrect then it gets into the importance of the mistake. If we are talking about the pronunciation of the word Pecan, then not saying anything is the responsible thing to do as it make no real difference and it's not worth insulting someone over it. If the mistake has to do with something that can be deemed truly important then there may be some level of responsiblitiy to at least point out that you think they may have something incorrect and that they need to validate what they are saying to prevent larger issues from occuring.
Just my opinion. Enjoy
ye i know what you are saying. In fact i think many people will agree that listening to the other is one of the hardest things ever. It requires patience and stamina. And that's what you, or me, or anybody else is lacking. To develop patience, it is helpful to recognize some similarities between other people and you. This way you will be listening to your own reflection, rather then someone else..
It takes all types. Even if you were thoughtful and patient...that doesnt help all types of people. Some might need a frustrated person to say why theyre wrong rather than a patient person just ask questions
If I find that edification, as in correcting something explained erroneously, I say, excuse me . . but, (then the correction is interjected).If I sense strongly that the correction will make no difference, I simply allow the talker to go on, while I go on to ponder about something else in my head, while holding for a brief time the semblance That I have been listening!
You have a major problem there. The best thing to do would be to ignore all and move on!! Why ruin a day.
Its a good question to ask and it is very curious one to ask too. But before anything else, Your actions have to be justified and you should ask this question to yourself and if you dont get answer (which you didnt) you must ask someone else (which you are doing now).
Everyone is different and relatively independent from each other. What you feel, what you do, what you speak is your individual birth right but what you feel on what others are doing is of no-concern of the society and hence should not be your concern too.
It might sound little harsh but I would like to provide you with an example. My father thinks - I waste my highly potent time - while watching movies or while going out with my friends. I think yes, I dont do anything "productive" but it makes me very relaxed so that I can focus well on my work back on Monday.
Now "productivity" and your feelings are mutually relative as we live in a society - which expects us to do things in a certain way. If you are living in a country like UK or USA you shouldnt do it - because it is rude to do so - and you would be wasting your time thinking about others and be not productive - so last thing you want to do is be rude. If you are in India or Pakistan where there is a lot of cultural energy flowing and way of life - you are at times appreciated of what you feel by others - but again you are not being productive.
So in a nutshell - you are not being productive yourself being irritated by seeing what or how others are being non-productive.
So you are doing what annoys you. Leave justification behind - but you simply dont like to be non-productiveness - so your reaction is not a good one by your own definitions.
Thanks
Madhav,
Just listen & foget as if you have not listened anything. And keep going.
I guess it just depends on your mood at the time really...Or you could be judging too quickly on the subjects at hand..,If you give
yourself time to absorb all thats being said instead of assuming its all irrelevant to you at the time then maybe your attitude will change in time...Patience is the key to understanding...in my opinion anyway..=)
My co worker got fired because he could not mind his own business and got irritated at other peoples conversations. If you are not a part of the conversation then your interuption is not welcome. I don't think it is a good thing to be irritated over other peoples conversation that does not concern you. Is there any possible way you have an over active mind and feel restless? You may have A.D. D. without the Med. you can not relax your mind is over active. Dont let that intense focus ruin your life. Seek medical treatment so things like this will not annoy you and you can live normally.
there is no right or wrong in this world. how useful it can be,what is the time available for you to listen is the point. there is learning involved in everything in the world. So your reaction may not be justified always.
we generally tend to measure others from our level of intellect. what is stupid and dumb talk is important to others. it may be true they do not know.we cannot judge others based on our experience and our knowledge. if we do react like this often trust me we may be missing on certain important and vital info. if we do not want to listen just switch off or participate and reply the obvious.try to pick some relevant stuff or learn that such things also can happen. this is just tolerance to others. Do not ignore such talk totally there might be some messages in them as there can be some treasure hidden even in trash. if we shun this type of talk and people,when we are in such situation there may not be anybody to listen to our crap.
there are levels of thinking. if you have achieved certain level of thinking in one subject and if you are watching people of other level discussing, your opinion on the subject of discussion will differ. under such situation, ideal way of reaction is only to listen and accept this as future guidance even when others are wrong. many times, even it may turn out to be that you youself may be wrong. when you listen to many, you will be able to compare. such analysis of comparison gives you more knowledge. this knowledge may help you better judge.
No, you are not justified. Everybody finds its way of keeping themselves engaged. You may have different ways... or say better ways. Everbody is different...You should not expect them to live life as you deem fit...
The answers post by the user, for information only, FunQA.com does not guarantee the right.
More Questions and Answers: