I have today found out a person I know is now bankrupt, is it normal to feel pleased about that?
He also liked to tell us about it.
He left work to start a business, and today told me he remortgaged his home to finance it, but it failed and he lost it all.
He is now back at work and, where once we were equals, I am now far far above him (had 2 promotions while he was gone).
I am so happy.
Am I wrong to be happy?
Answer:
That's sad. Try to find it in your heart to have sympathy for those less fortunate than you. He may not have a great personality but yours is not much better. Try to put yourself in his shoes and think how awful it would be for you. You don't have to like him, but having such a hard heart is a bad sign.
Yeah. That's just mean and petty.
Not much better than his attitude when he was bragging.
It sounds like you are both very status-oriented people. Don't you think it's all a bit shallow? Is that all that really matters?
Its not normal for me but whatever floats your boat. I am a firm beliver in what goes around comes around and it obviously did for this guy but you have to remember your gloating could one day have a bad come back on you!!
Are you male?
If you are male, you may be hard-wired to be happy about it.
very very interesting article. explains a lot
http://www.newscientist.com/article.ns?i...
Only if it makes you feel happy (in a sick kind of way). I think it's human nature to see the "other guy" get his.
After seeing what you get up too on here. You probably would dance on a mothers grave. May be normal to you and you only
only if he owes you money
You do sound vindictive. Never take pleasure in the suffering of another because what goes around comes around. You might be next on the "lose it all" list. Or as the Bible says, "Pride goeth before a fall".
I, personally, think it's normal to envy somebody because of their success, especially if they're arrogant in addition. It's a sad occurrence what happened to this guy, so I'd probably feel a little sympathetic as well.
Ever hear the phrase, "There but for the grace of God goes I"?
No matter how poor he was, hes done something that took nerve and daring, he risked and tried, that's important, you took the 'safe' way. You may think you are 'far above him'
but honestly he put it on the line and you haven't.
If he had succeeded you would have been jealous, he didn't and so he validated your choice. That's why you are happy.
But somewhere in there there is a worm of dissatisfaction with your own desire to maintain the status quo and stay in a firm and not take a chance.
Like its better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all, its better to take a chance and lose then never to have tried at all.
Your question is, "Am I wrong to be happy?" Morally, to take joy in anothers loss is wrong. I gave you a possible reason as to why it even matters to you...it validates your choice and denigrates his. Even though he did something daring and you didn't. His behavior isn't at issue, yours, through your question, was. I read your question correctly, I am sorry you didn't understand.
I don't think it's wrong to feel happy, just try not to be too overt about it! :) It sounds like this person truly deserves the Karmic butt-kicking he's getting, and you are probably NOT the only associate of his who is pleased to see him fall on his face. He'll either learn something from this or just go on to be a jerk about something else.
well if he was a smug arrogant a hole, then i can understand your feelings... im sure you would not wish failure upon anyone you know... but when its someone who has rubbed your nose in it making you feel inferior, then hey hun = chill and enjoy the old saying... What goes around comes around
Yes.
That is why you're asking. And it doesn't have a lick to do with him. It's about your own perceptions. If you had a more healthy view and a greater grasp on what's important you wouldn't feel pleasure with his pain. Your statement that you are now 'above' him aludes to the belief that meaning in life comes from 'feeling above' other people. Where at one point he 'felt above' you (your perception). Even if he did have an arrogant personality a more healthy person would dismiss this and feel compassionate about his misguided views. I have made this mistake a million times over myself, so please don't take this as a lecture. I am just trying to give you an honest answer.
If you look at any of the popular spiritual teachings of today and in the past I doubt there is a part where it's condoned to dance around when someone else fails at something, or life teaches them a lesson about humility. We are supposed to be healthy enough to not let their arrogance bother us to trigger an emotion like that. So what I'm saying is that maybe you need to introspect on your own values and beliefs.
The golden boy, has fallen from his perch. Is it wrong to feel good about it, why definitely? However, when he was on top, he didn't hesitate in making you and more than likely others, feel beneath him, so why in hell, should you feel bad about his decline? If he were a good person, it would be different, but he appears to be, an egotistical jerk. Do you think for a minute that if the tables were turned, he'd have a kind word or thought for you? Forgive the french, but hell no. He would be laughing, his you know what off. He wouldn't give it a second thought, so don't you. Am I mean? You can tell me.
well it be a long time b4 he get to your position,been bankrupt,will seriously affect your credit rating.in fact he have difficulty in borrowing money from banks in the future.damm...thats gonna hurt unable 2 borrow money..
Sounds like you don't like him, therefore of course you would be happy.
But if he's going to play with the big boys and live that lifestyle, the fall can be pretty hard.
At least he had a taste of the good life and now he is back to square one.
We are all born with nothing, so if we die with nothing what have we lost?. Nothing!
(unless you were born with a silver spoon in your mouth you lucky Bastard)
Yes, I would be exactly like you!! People who show off about what they have and then lose it all, well its just desserts!
Gloat away!!
i can see why you would especially if he was showboating about all his success. it does sound a bit mean but such is life. at least he took a risk even if it didnt work out and no doubt he'll take another. hopefully this time he'll keep his mouth shut about what he has.
Us humans are complex creatures. Our emotions vary wildly according to what situation we are in.
Unfortunately, it is human nature for a person to feel pleased when someone has in effect "got their just desserts". Spiritualists refer to it as karma, ie what goes around comes around. This isn't a bad thing.
Sometimes though, a person can feel pleased about another person's misfortune, and that is not a good thing. If that person has not deserved to suffer their misfortune, then it is bad for another person to feel happy about that.
It sounds like your friend wasn't a great friend, if all he did was brag about his successes and imply that he was better than everyone else. So you could say that he got his just desserts, and has come back to earth with the rest of us.
Sure, feel happy, but limit that to five minutes, and then move forward and don't think about it anymore.
These events may have served to change your friend from a braggart into a more humble person, so let him be and just remain thankful that you have not suffered the losses he has.
All the best.
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